What if Your Family Disagrees with Your Decision to be Cremated?

Anita Chauhan

Have you recently decided to choose cremation as your end of life arrangement rather than a burial or other funeral options?

This is a big decision to make, and it’s one that your family and loved ones should respect. But what happens if they do not? How do you share your choices with them and make sure that your final wishes will be respected and observed? Beyond a living will, it’s good that you educate and inform your loved ones and family on your choices.

If you haven’t approached your family yet, consider the points in this blog to help you find the best way to talk to your family about your choice to be cremated.

When you share your wishes with them, the best-case scenario is that your loved ones will hear you and respect your choice to be cremated versus being buried. But in the worst-case scenario, there is a chance that your family isn’t going to be on board with your decision. If that happens, here are our best tips on how to make sure your wishes are respected and avoid as much potential conflict as possible. Read more on what to do if your family disagrees with your final desire to be cremated below.

Begin by trying to understand where they are coming from

If you and your loved ones are not on the same page for your desire to be cremated, it’s essential to find out why. Understanding where your loved ones and family are coming from and why they believe that cremation is not a good option for you can help manage and speak to their concerns.


If you find yourself in this situation, ask them why they don’t believe cremation is the best option for you. By listening to their concerns, you may understand why they object to your decision, from feeling overwhelmed with the suddenness of your decision or the fact that it deviates from tradition (religious, cultural or otherwise). While they may think that they have some good reasons to object, remember, the ultimate choice is yours.

Breakdown the reasons for choosing cremation

Once you’ve figured out exactly why they have protested your choice to be cremated, you should approach them to discuss why you, solely, have made a choice. Breaking it down for them can help them understand things from your point of view.

You may have explained your reasoning when you first shared your end of life plans, but if you did not, this would be the ideal time. It’ll help your family and loved ones understand your choices and help make the process smoother.

Demystify cremations

Many people object to their loved ones’ plans for cremation because they may not understand the process of cremation. If that is the case, they are not alone. Many people in North American culture are more comfortable with the idea of burial thanks to culture, the media and societal norms. Cremation, while popular and prevalent in many cultures and religions, seems to be shrouded in mystery. If you can provide your family with education around the process, they may understand and accept your choice.

Need help? In this past post, we break down the cremations and what happens to your body during the cremation process.


Ask them to consider your perspectives

Chances are, your loved ones aren’t probably going to shift perspectives overnight. Hopefully, with time, they will be able to come around to accepting your decision. It may take time and space, but when you approach them again with your final wishes to be cremated, consider asking them to see where you are coming from.

And who knows? Your choice may inspire some of your loved ones and family members to consider cremation as well.

If you believe cremation to be your best option, let Eirene help. Contact us today to learn more.